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Probably a question that is never asked. The question that is asked is “who the f*** farted?”. We get so pissed of when someone does it that we forget to inquire about the basics. How does this grand process work? Have you ever thought about it? If there are girls/women out there who have the audacity to say “Oh, girls don’t fart” or “I don’t fart” then wake up and face the truth. Everyone does it or should I say everyone has to do it. The only difference is, some do it openly and take on the consequences like a man and some are sly little fucks who let out those horrid sneakers that Hitler could have used in his gas chambers to torture his captives.

Now, coming to the process and how it works. As humans we all need to eat every now and then. When this food goes into our stomach it mixes with all kinds of digestive juices and acids. That is bound to make some gas now don’t it. Some foods are considered more gassy than others. Beans is ammo for any farter who likes  to gas out people around him/her. Beans has something that has I will never understand. It’s never cooked in my house for this very reason. No one likes to get gassed out under the covers, that will get you killed especially if the person next to you has had a good meal consisting of beans.

The gas is also formed by the oxygen that we breathe in. The oxygen that we breathe in gets absorbed by different organs and when the air reaches the intestines it contains a good proportion of nitrogen. Now when this blends with the digestive juices and acids it forms carbon dioxide. Now the intensity of the fart depends on a few factors.  Most important is, how long has the fart been held up before release? The longer it stays in your guts the more gas and more bacteria hence the horrid stink.

Secondly depends on the type of food that we eat. As I mentioned earlier, beans are ammo for the farter. Greens are another thing that can really fire up things around you.

It’s not bad to fart, it’s very natural. Fart away and be proud of it!!!